My September Goals {Goals with Grace}

So, here's the thing. I did not do very well with my goals for August.  None of my goals were completely finished by the end of August. At first, I was pretty tough on myself when the last few days of August came and went and I still had nothing to check off the list. I wasn't even sure if I'd talk about my August goals again on here.

But then a week or so ago, I was reading Amy's post where she reviewed her goals. She wrote,

"OK...so I did terrible!  But that's why I love Goals with Grace! Here are my September goals..."

Amy's perspective was such a good reminder for me to not put too much weight on what I accomplish. Some months don't go quite as planned, and that's okay. Maybe you had a month like me and you're feeling kinda down about it... grace is an amazing thing. God doesn't love us based on what we accomplish. Let that sink in. Isn't it so refreshing? I'll keep going with these goals because it's fun for me - I love planning my month and hearing your goals, too! So before I share my goals for September, here are the goals I set for August... 

1. Read a book with Luke -  I started Emma by Jane Austen but haven't finished. Luke did, though! 

2. Complete our bathroom makeover - Almost there! I'm hoping to share pictures within the week.

3. Plan a special get together with friends - I did have a lot of really great time with friends last month, but not really an organized get together. So we'll give partial credit here ;)

4. Get other women involved with a Strong and Sweet video series - Still working through this. I need to spend some thing focusing on it to figure out exactly where I'm headed with this one. 

5. Start working on family photo albums - I'm excited to look through our dating pictures and see the progression of all that God's done since then.

Now it's time for September's goals! We're already half way through the month, but I think this list still seems pretty manageable. 

This month each goal represents something I'd like to develop more in my life. I'm really looking forward to a productive (and grace-filled) second half of September. I'll keep you updated at the start of October... and I hope you'll do the same! What are your goals for September? How did your goals for August go? I'd love to know!

Love,

Bonnie

*One last note: I've been having fun creating different blog designs for Strong and Sweet. I don't feel quite settled on this one yet, but it's fun to try different things. So you can probably expect to see things changing around here every so often until I find a look that feels just right. :) 

My Birthday Recap {& a thank you!}

I just want to start today's post with a quick thank you. Some of you reading today know that my father-in-law, Gerry, was in a serious motorcycle accident last Wednesday in Chicago. Countless people are praying for him and we have seen amazing healing in his body. It looks like he will be discharged on the 3rd and doing therapy close to home. We are really thankful for that! I can't express how grateful I am for everyone who has prayed for Gerry and supported the whole Stoltzfoos fam during this time. God is a great, great God - able to heal 100% and work all things together for our good. Luke, Bekah, and I can't wait to have Gerry home, hug him, and see the healing miracles continue. Thanks again, friends!

So this past Saturday, I turned twenty three! The whole weekend was so special. The night before my birthday, Luke returned home from work with Runaway Bride and candy for a movie night, just the two of us (Bekah was fast asleep in her crib). On Saturday, the three of us slept in a little and then I enjoyed my usual birthday giddiness and morning silliness with my girl. I love the excitement of the morning on a special day and Bekah is so bright eyed and happy in the morning!  If you check out this video on my Instagram account, you can listen to a little "birthday song" Bekah sang for me. The video is only about 10 seconds long but I laugh every time I watch it! This was my first birthday as a momma and, I've gotta say, having Bekah to share the day with sure made turning twenty three extra special.

After a slow wake up, playing with Bekah, and getting all cleaned up and ready, we got in the car and drove to Panera Bread for an early lunch. Bekah napped pretty well (thanks to some Daddy snuggles) so Luke and I were able to just lazily lean back in our booth, drink more than our fair share of hazelnut coffee, and eat delicious food. That morning had such a slow, peaceful pace to it. It was perfect. I loved seeing his handsome smile from across the table. On our way home, Luke dropped me off at HomeGoods (one of my favorite stores) so I could walk around and soak in all the HomeGoods goodness. After twenty minutes or so, I was back in the car and we headed home.

Saturday evening, my parents came to visit and took Bekah and I out to eat at the restaurant where Luke works. I love visiting him at work, talking to his coworkers, and, of course, spending time with my parents and Beks... so it was such a good way to celebrate. Near the end of our meal, Luke came by and scooped up Bekah. He couldn't wait to show her off to the people at his tables. On our way out, we bumped into a lady who told us, "He is the proudest daddy I have ever seen!". That's my Luke! 

On Sunday we continued with some casual b-day activities. We went to church in the morning, then picked up a yummy lunch to eat at home. We lounged around our living room in our most comfy clothes and watched a movie called American Blogger. That was my choice... since I was the birthday girl and all :). A storm rolled in, a cozy afternoon nap happened, and then we spent the later part of the evening at Target. This weekend was so good. Simple and full of family. I was definitely extra thankful for the gift of family this year, with everything surrounding Gerry's accident. People are so precious and, man, am I blessed with some good ones to call my family and friends. :)

Thanks again for the continued prayers for my father-in-law. I'm looking forward to being able to share some great reports on his progress this week. How could I pray for you? What's going on? :)

Love,

Bonnie

A Mid-Year Celebration! {Your Names for 2014}

Today four of my friends are sharing their stories about life in 2014 so far. At the beginning of the year, I joined with a bunch of you as we "named our years" - we decided what it was that we wanted to see happen in the year ahead as we partnered with God. I named my year "Made for this" and it has transformed the way I view my life and challenges. I was so touched and powerfully encouraged by their stories… I think you will be, too! 

"At the end of 2013 and the turn of the new year, I was thinking of all the things I would like the Lord to do in my life in the coming year...There has been so many changes in our family in the past few years. I heard of a few friends giving their "new year" a name. I decided to claim my new year the year of "restoration"..... Now, seven months later, I was challenged to review my year and see how God has worked in our lives so far this year....It says in Joel 2:25-26 - "And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpiller, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you." In the past two years, our hearts have been torn apart from pain from the death of one of our sons, and several other things that the enemy has been throwing our way.... I am asking God to "restore" healed hearts within our lives...to restore family members that have alienated themselves within our families.. As I think back on how "I WANTED GOD TO WORK", I am reminded that my ways are not always His ways, and my time is not always HIS time. So with that said, God did not bring to pass what I wanted Him to do yet, BUT, my sister who has pretty much closed her ears and eyes to the things of God the past 15 years, is on the verge of recommitting her life to Him again. She is praying and starting to proclaim her love for Him once again. She is getting involved in some church activities. It is so refreshing to once again share those "Godly conversations" that we did for so very many years. So, I will rest in Him, knowing that He sees the "finished picture", and I will not get discouraged when He answers in a way that is different to the way that I want Him answer... I will hold on the the promise in John 14:1 - "Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me." I CHOOSE to take God at His word. I choose to stand on Matthew 6:33 "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." I choose to walk in "joy" as he makes me more like Him. I will believe Romans 15:13.... "Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost." I will continue to praise Him for who He is, and I will still believe that the restoration for my family will come in His time.

PS... there are STILL 5 months till the end of this year…"

"Thinking back to the beginning of the year, I thought "a year of opportunities" would be a great title for my new year. honestly I haven't thought about it too much over the past few months, however thinking about it now, I've learned that it's a perfect title. God has given Brian and I so many opportunities this year. It's been a lot of small ones but they all grow into a big one. We still have our jobs, 2 sets of our best friends became great parents to beautiful daughters that I love calling my nieces, I'm assisting two worship leaders, I've moved into a new area of creative and media works, and Brian and I have been teaching more. There may be more opportunities with ministry callings at school as well. This is only some of what God is doing in the past 7 months and I can't wait to see what he has in store for the rest of the year!"

"Focusing on embracing everything that comes my way has made such a huge difference in my year so far! Moving 3000 miles from home and getting married has been both wonderful and challenging. Whilst some of the difficult aspects would've shaken me in the past, remembering the name that I had for 2014 has made these obstacles much easier to face. Trying to figure out finances has been quite stressful as I'm not yet able to get a job since I'm still waiting for my work permit but every month since I've been here, everything has come together for us and we know that we can only thank God for that. Embracing this season of unemployment by getting to know my new friends better by spending that time with them rather than stay home and panicking constantly about money has been so liberating. It's also really helped me to put down some strong roots here and despite missing my friends in the UK, I'm incredibly thankful for the new ones that I'm making here too."

"This year has been a roller coaster of emotions, hurt, and pain followed by God using that brokenness to restore me and the people around me. At the beginning of this year I committed to seek out intentional relationships and ways to encourage the people around me in Christ's love. Needless to say God answered that pray with practical ways to practice this, and these were ways that were beyond what I expected. Because of God's grace and my desire to have intentional, meaningful relationships I was able to have a different perspective on what was going on around me. I restored some broken relationships, encouraged friends around me to seek Christ in the midst of trials and suffering, and I strengthened relationships I never imagined would last. With God's guidance, and a lot of prayer, I have grown so much in the past six months just by trying to see people as God sees them and love them like Christ loves me. Relationships are a precious gift from God and I'm glad to have been able to experience all that God had planned. I cannot wait to see where God leads me in this next chapter of life as a college graduate, starting my first job, and getting to form relationships with beautiful families who the world views as broken and hopeless but I know God loves. The remainder of the year I will prayerfully seek to be a vessel of God's love to those around me who appear broken, defeated, and hopeless."
_________________________________________________________________________________
*bold/italic emphasis mine

It's not too late to name the rest of your year! What are your wildest dream for the last months of 2014? What would you name your year? I'd love to hear from you!

Love,
Bonnie

Want to read a little more about naming your year? I love this exercise of faith!

Read my original post on "Naming Your Year" by clicking here.

Read my post on why I named my year "Made For This" by clicking here. 

My August Goals {+ a July Recap}

You might remember that earlier this month I shared my goals for the month of July. It was a really, really great month of establishing some new routines and adjusting to life as the three of us. I have fresh vision building in my heart for family life, myself personally, and for Strong+Sweet. Now that July is all done, I've written up 5 new goals for the month of August. But first, how did I do with my July goals? Read below to find out!

1. Read a book with Luke {nope!} We did actually buy a book to read together so I'm moving this to my August goals.

2. Loose 5 pounds {I think so?} The funny thing about this one is that we don't own a scale. I just assumed I'd find some way to weigh myself, so I'll have to get to that soon. Although I don't know my current weight, I do know that this month I made some better decisions about the food I ate and the activities I did. I've been taking nice long walks with Bekah, doing a little ReFit Rev (a Christian Ministry like Zumba), and eating lots of  veggies. I've also started limiting the days that I can have "sweet stuff". 

3. Write 10 entries in Bekah's book {done!} I keep a pretty little notebook where I write notes and stories to help me capture some of these early days with Bekah. Some of the things I wrote about this week included: Bekah rolling over for the first time, our trip to the beach, Bekah attending her first wedding, and the cute sounds she's been making. For example, "Un-geeeeee" is one sound she makes. It sounds like "hungry" and it cracks me up when she says it right before it's time to eat. She's a cutie. :)

4. Blog a new contributor post {nope!} This one is sitting in my drafts partially completed. I'd like to get it posted this week. A few past contributors helped me out and I love what they had to say.

5. Develop a self care + beauty plan {done!} This month I wanted to develop a daily makeup routine. I was starting from square one and was ready to learn! I'm happy to say it happened. I'll be writing a whole post about this in August, sharing about my time with Kristen (check out her blog here) and how I've kept up with what she taught me. Thank you, Kristen!

July was fun! Here are my August Goals:

1. Read a book with Luke - trying this one again in August. Read, Bonnie, Read!

2. Complete a bathroom makeover - fresh paint, storage solutions, and decorating :)

3. Plan a special get together with friends - we have some new neighbors I'd like to get to know!

4. Get other women involved with Strong+Sweet through a video series - I'm so excited about this! 

5. Start working on family photo albums - I've never organized our pictures from dating, engagement, or our 1st year of marriage. Now that we're approaching 2 years of marriage and Bekah is here, I have a lot of catching up to do. I think I'll try to do this using Shutterfly. 

What would you like to make happen in August? I'd love to hear your goals. August has a whole lot of potential. :)

Love,

Bonnie

Momma-hood: What I'm Learning {7 Weeks}

I'm pretty sure that ever since I was three years old and had a new baby brother, I've believed that I was made to be a mom. I've always been very nurturing and dreamt about raising a family. I saw a gift that God gave me in caring for people and I felt so good about that gift. 

Back in October, those life-long dreams of momma-hood were realized when early one morning, I stood in our tiny little apartment bathroom and saw the double positive lines on my pregnancy test. I really enjoyed being pregnant. I loved watching my belly grow and adored hearing Bekah's beautiful and strong heart beat at our monthly appointments. Luke and I loved dreaming about the sweet baby growing inside of me and we loved thanking God for this amazing gift of life.

Then on June 9th, I got to hold my little girl in my arms for the very first time. It was almost like we had been friends for a long, long time rather than two strangers meeting for the first time. She's my girl and I'm her momma and I am crazy about her. She brings out the best in me - helping me give up so much of my selfishness so I can be the mom God made me to be.

I want to be honest and share with you that I was in for a big, big shock in the first few weeks of motherhood. It was really hard. There was a tiredness in those first weeks that just can not be compared to anything else I've experienced. I think moms are often tempted to be too hard on themselves, believing they aren't doing enough. Those thoughts come really early. At times, I didn't handle all of the difficulties very well. I cried a lot. I felt so frustrated with myself and in moments I felt pretty hopeless. Everything was so new and different and I didn't know if I was handling the changes well.  

It was the funniest thing, because I felt all of that confusion at the same time that I was feeling unconditional, sweet, and total love for my girl. That's parenting, I guess. Those first weeks were hard mixed with wonderful. And there are still moments that are really tough - moments that cause me to whimper desperate prayers to God.

One night early this week, Luke was at work and I was home with Bekah. I am so thankful that I get to be a stay at home mom, but I was pretty tired and we had just hit the time that tends to be her fussy time. I just could not figure out what was wrong and I prayed out of sheer desperation that God would give me some insight into how to soothe her. I wondered if I was causing her pain in some way or if there was some need I was totally missing. So I just asked God for help. I don't know what kind of help I was expecting, maybe an audible answer or some kind of sense for what to do. A little time passed and Bekah and I were sitting on the couch, some extra burping helped her fall right asleep. There really wasn't a clear answer I heard from God that night and I wasn't sure what to think about that. I just felt so desperate and I knew He cared - so why didn't He respond in the way I wanted him to?

The next day, my friend Kelly came over to help me figure out a new furniture arrangement for the living room. We actually ended up just putting the room back exactly the way it was (and by "we" I mean Luke - he is so nice!) but God used our get together for so much good. Kelly stayed for a little while and talked with Luke and I. Kelly is also a new mom, and a dear friend to me. I can't stop thanking God for that afternoon, because during our short talk my heart was totally refreshed. It was a simple conversation about life as a new mom and sleep schedules - but it was like God ordered the whole thing to encourage me where I desperately needed encouragement. Kelly shared little things she had learned or heard from her mom-friends. It felt like each piece of wisdom checked off a box on my list of solutions that I needed. I received some great insight about making it through that fussy hour and how to help her (and us!) develop good sleep patterns. Last night Bekah slept six and a half hours total in her crib without us having to stay up for hours upon hours soothing her. That was a record and huge victory for our little family!

I shared all of this with you for a couple reasons. First, because it was really good for my heart to work through those first weeks. Whew! Weight lifted. ;) I also shared this because God taught me a really meaningful lesson this week. I asked God for wisdom and He gave it to me - but in a much better way than I could have anticipated. He used my friendship with Kelly to give me insight into the best ways to help my daughter. With this method came the added bonus of something I really needed, quality time with a good friend. 

God is so good and creative and passionate about getting us to work together. He orchestrated my need and Kelly's abundance and together we figured out some really tough stuff! You know, before Kelly came over that day, I wondered if I should feel badly that I couldn't figure out my own living room arrangement. Looking back, I realize what a shame it would have been if I gave into my pride and self-reliance and missed out on that time with Kelly and our conversation. 

So today I am enormously thankful. Thankful to be a momma. Thankful for a good living room set up ;). Thankful for my friendship with Kelly. And thankful that God cares so deeply for me that He hears my prayers, orchestrates the very best way to answer them, and teaches me through them.

How has God used relationships to answer your prayers?

Love,
Bonnie

Vacation Bucket List + Things I Love

Happy Weekend!

Tomorrow we leave for the beach! I am so excited and can barely believe the time is here. This year I decided to make a list of things I want to do at the beach (tons of family time, good conversations, game nights, dates with Luke, etc.) and things I don't want to give my time to (spend a lot of time online or on my phone).

I like how the list turned out and I can't wait to arrive at the shore tomorrow morning. Ocean City, New Jersey - you are the best!

I'll be back a couple times during the next week and can't wait to share a new contributor post with you. I hope you all have a great, restful weekend and productive week ahead! For now, here are a few things on + off the web that I'm loving this week.

1. This beautiful article by Ann Voskamp - I have never read something so powerful and encouraging about blogging. I can't get it out of my mind. Check it out!

2. She Reads Truth released their new app (currently just for iPhone) this morning! I can't wait until it comes out for Android. (This is a free tool I use to help me say committed to reading the Bible - I love it and think you might, too!)

3. My new friend Anna over at The Beauty Section shared this tutorial on getting wavy beach curls. Planning to try this soon!

4. I'm feeling very excited and inspired to draw more these days - I included one of my drawings in my Happy Home Wednesday post and have been filling up my Illustration & Inspiration board on pinterest. Looking forward to drawing this week at the beach. :)

Love you, friends!
Bonnie

My July Goals

     At the start of each month, I've been reading along with The Tiny Twig as she shares her monthly goals. I wasn't sure at first if this was something I wanted to share on Strong+Sweet. How interested would anyone be in reading my goals for the month? But you know what I realized? When I read the monthly goals of other bloggers - it makes a difference in my life. I love learning from people who are going after the life they want to live.

So this month, I decided to join in on the fun! Today I'm linking up with The Tiny Twig in her monthly "Goals with Grace" post. If you follow this link here, you'll find Hayley's original post and the links of other bloggers who have also shared what they want to accomplish this month. If you have some time, take a look! It is really inspiring. 

Here are my goals for July… 

1. Read a book with Luke: My husband is a reader and I love that about him! This is a good way for me to enjoy something my husband enjoys with him. It also might cut down on some of my screen time… which wouldn't be a bad thing. :)

2. Loose 5 pounds: I delivered Bekah only a month ago and I'm breastfeeding, so weight loss is sort of a funny thing for me right now. I've lost about 20 pounds since delivery and this month I'd like to loose 5 more. By loosing 5 more pounds, I'll be right around my weight at the start of pregnancy. I have wanted to loose some weight and live a more active, healthy lifestyle for a long, long time. I have been thinking a lot about this lately and I'm ready to do what it takes to make it happen. (I need to speak that over myself a lot - it still sort of freaks me out!) Next week I'll receive a release from my doctor to resume exercise and friends, I am ready to go after this goal! I will definitely need your encouragement - so I plan to share more about this and my plan sometime soon. I might loose all 5 pounds simply from feeding little Bekah, but either way, this goal will help me make better choices.

3. Write 10 entries in Bekah's book: Before Bekah was born I bought a pretty little notebook that I've been using to jot down short letters and memories for her to read one day. She is growing and changing so rapidly right now - which is so fun for us to watch. It's nice to have a simple method for capturing some of these early memories like our first dinner out as a family or the first toy she played with. I can't wait to read back through this journal with my beautiful teenage Bekah one day. This girl is such a joy - I love her so much!

4. Blog a new contributor post: Strong+Sweet is a collaborative blog to encourage+empower. Some of the best responded to posts here have been the ones where others did the writing! I love that and hope to see more of this collaboration in the future. If this is a place where people are encouraged to use their gifts to build others up, then this is a good place. I have a few ideas running through my head about the next contributor posts - so with this as a July goal, you should be seeing a new one very soon!

5. Develop a self care + beauty plan: Remember a few months ago when I shared about self care? I mentioned that I've always had some doubts in the makeup and hair care department. I feel like I have a lot of room to learn and grow in this area, and this month I'm doing something about it! This one is in the works already and three sweet girls (Anna + Kristen + Betsy) have been helping me out. This month I'll specifically focus on hair and makeup. I'm planning to write a post all about the details of the journey soon - this is really stretching me and I am excited!

Now it's your turn! Would you take a few minutes to share a goal or two… or five.. here in the comments? Or, if you blog your goals - share your post with me! I am always encouraged and empowered when I hear other people share their goals. Setting S.M.A.R.T goals is a huge part of leadership (having influence) and living in an aggressive, take-on-the-world kind of way. 

I'm excited to grow with you and make July a month where we overcome things that we thought we could never overcome before. :) So, what are your goals for July?

Love,

Bonnie

Move In Fears + Faith

It's been a busy and wonderful week around here. On Tuesday our good friend Nick helped us move into our new apartment and it is good to be home.

Want to know something funny? After all the time I spent dreaming about our new apartment and waiting in excited anticipation for it to be our home, on move in day, I still had to fight a bunch of sadness and fear.

My sister Annie came to visit us on our last night in the old apartment. She has an amazingly kind heart and from the time she entered the door she was complimenting our little space and encouraging me. She reminded me of the things I really loved about apartment 105. It was such a cozy little space, one we had worked hard to make feel like home, and I really did love it. More than the space itself, I loved what God had done there - all the memories Luke and I had built there together. Annie's kind words were such a blessing to me - but I found myself using them as a reason to be afraid.

I thought, "What if our new apartment doesn't feel like home? What if the extra space makes us spend less time together?" Silly, right? But it's true. Sometimes even in the midst of blessings and God working in our lives we can loose focus when we fix our eyes on fear and doubt instead.

I carried that fear around for several hours and by the end of the evening I knew I had to take an official stand against it. Giving into fear was causing me to miss out on the joy of the new apartment and a really exciting time for our little family.

I took a walk down the hall from our new apartment back to apartment 105. I stood in the kitchen and prayed for just a minute. I made a simple statement, turning my worry over to God and then I said these two verses:

Philippians 4:6-7: 6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

Notice the simple, effective steps God lays out here to beating worry. And the promise!

+

Ephesians 3:20-21: 20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. 21 Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.

In any situation where we see lack, we can stand against that defeating mindset and imagine a better future with God - that's what I'm believing over how God will use this new space! He'll get glory from our family and our new family home and it's going to be better than anything I could ask for or imagine! (So I should definitely start asking for and imagining some big things ;))

These verses have healed my heart and brought me out of the dark places of fear so many times. God is good and His Word changes everything. That night a fresh adoration of God grew in my heart again. He is always willing to lift those deceiving, fear-filled thoughts off of us (if we'll just trust them to Him) and help us put on faith. Since that night in the kitchen of apartment 105, my fear and worry about this transition have totally been lifted. 

So here's a challenge for all of us this afternoon, whatever you're facing this weekend and whatever fears are causing you to be filled with dread, start speaking verses like these over your situation and trust Him at his Word. Tell Him the things that are burdening you. Whatever you have to say isn't silly or meaningless, He's happy to listen and ready to partner with you to strengthen that beautiful, world-changing faith that lives inside of you all over again. 

Love you, friends! Happy Memorial Day!

Bonnie

*Do you have a verse you say or write when you're replacing fear with faith? I'd love for you to share that or a related testimony here -- let's build one another up! I love reading what you have to say!

Made for This: Self Care

Happy Tuesday, friends!

I hope you've had a great start to the week. We're on spring break right now and the weather is so beautiful. We're about to go on our second walk for the day… it's just too nice to stay inside! Last night a bunch of families from our apartment building got together for a potluck dinner. It was a great night getting to know more of the couples that are living here on campus. How's your week going? :)

Do you remember when I wrote about naming my year a few months ago? You can check out that post by clicking here. This year, I chose the phrase "made for this" to name my year. It has been very empowering to have that little phrase to say whenever I'm facing a challenge or feeling afraid. I love that simple reminder that Jesus has made me more than a conqueror. I hope those of you who named your year with me have found it to be a helpful practice, too. Remember, it's not too late to name your year. If there's an encouraging word or phrase you want to speak over the challenges you're facing, give it a try. I'd love to hear about it. :)

Today I'm looking forward to sharing about another area of growth that is a part of my "made for this" year. This year I want to grow in my self-care habits, beauty routine, and clothing choices. I know, I know, that might seem a little shallow at first… but hear me out. :) Through the years I have heard myself say things like "I'm just not good at doing my makeup" or "I'm bad at putting together outfits" or "I can never do my hair how I like it" wayyyy too many times. Those might just seem like silly little comments, but I've learned that if I get in the habit of telling myself that I can't grow in areas that are challenging for me, I'm going to start to believe it.

This year I am going to change the way I think about myself. I am changing the script in my head that says "I am not good enough to meet the challenges of self care" and make it sound more like, "I am made for overcoming the challenges I face with self care". 

So, you may be wondering, what are those self-care challenges for me?


1. Make-up and Hair Care: 
I've become way too good at convincing myself that these are areas I could never grow in. Make-up and hair care are a little intimidating for me, mostly because of all the products that are available. I think the best solution I've found here is to ask for advice from friends who feel more confident or experienced in this area. They often provide helpful, personalized suggestions for products that will suit me best. My friend Alyson and I even talked about getting a small group of friends together for a girls night to learn more about skin care, face masks, and other things like that. And even though I still don't feel very educated about make-up, it really helps me to just give it a try every day. Taking a few extra minutes to freshen up my face gives me a nice boost. :)
Goal: 1. Find a small collection of products that work well for me and use them daily.


2. Creating a wardrobe I feel great in:
Pinterest has been an amazing tool in helping me define my style. Just like in any other area of life, it is so easy for me to get caught up in comparing myself to other girls and begin to think that I need to be like them or like what they like… but the beautiful thing is that we all have unique tastes. And we should embrace that! Looking at the pins I've collected over time on my clothing board, I've discovered that I am most drawn to classic shapes, feminine style, and neutral colors. Something about having that board is so encouraging to me because it just makes life feel a little more simple. Shopping has become easier and so has donating clothes that don't fit that general description. Getting ready for the day is fun and stress-free when I like what I own and it feels like me. If you also find it challenging to identify styles you feel good in, try making that Pinterest board. :) Pin images of outfits you're drawn to and go back and review that board every once in a while to see the beautiful picture that is taking shape. Maybe you're like me and sometimes you feel that you just can't make good clothing decisions, well, I just don't think that's true about either of us. :) I think we can overcome the things that feel challenging to us. I also think our clothing style can say a lot about the things that are important to us on the inside… the things God has put in our hearts about how we want to interact with the world and the presence we want to bring with us wherever we go. That might mean your style is a little more wild and bubbly, or a little more sweet and peaceful… either way, you're beautiful and your clothing can express that lovely heart God's given you.
Goals: 1. Donate current 'giveaway' bag and 10 other pieces by April. *if anyone nearby wants to look through that donation bag just let me know! 
2. After Bekah comes, work through Hayley Morgan's 31 Days to a no-brainer wardrobe. 

3. Caring for my teeth: 

Just ask my Mom, I was not a fun child (…or teenager) to take to the dentist. I didn't take great care of my teeth growing up and it is so tempting for me to put off dentist visits. My teeth have had a few issues in the past couple years and I've wasted way too much time worrying about them. Instead of worrying, I should have been trusting that God would take care of the financial costs and that I didn't need to be afraid of going to get them taken care of. This year I've been taking much better care of them on a daily basis and I am finally biting the bullet and finding a dentist in this area so I can't put off visits anymore. :) As funny as it sounds, this year I want to overcome even the smallest fears, like those about my teeth.
Goal: 1. Find a new family dentist by the end of the week and schedule appointment.

4. Getting Active + Exercising
I think one of the most helpful things for me to remember with exercise is that I don't have to do what everyone else does… I just have to do something. I love taking walks and zumba or pilates videos are a lot of fun for me, too! I think we've all felt that discouragement that comes from trying to develop an exercise routine, doing well for a few days, and then feeling totally bummed out when we break the good habits we were building. But just like all the other areas I'm writing about today, I've got to believe I can overcome that discouragement and stay active. It's too easy to focus on how much I don't want to exercise, so instead I'm going to start focusing on what will happen if I stick with it.

Goals: 
1. Create an exercise record chart to hang on the fridge. 
2. Get active for at least 20 minutes 4x a week. 

Whew! It feels good to share all of that. :) I'd love to hear your thoughts on how the name of your year is impacting your daily life. Is there something you need to start telling yourself you are "made for"? Do you have any advice for me as I move forward in my self-care journey?

Love,
Bonnie

My Pinterest Clothing Board - Self Care + Beauty Board - Fitness + Outdoors Board

Our First Twenty-Three Weeks with Bekah

Well, there are only about seventeen weeks until we get to meet our little girl! That means I am a little more than halfway through this pregnancy. Every day it becomes a little more real that Bekah really is coming!

I'm excited to share some of our pregnancy journey with you today! Below you'll find a collection of some of our favorite thoughts, experiences, and silly little memories from the past twenty-three weeks or so.

The Big News

• Luke and I were not surprised to find out we were expecting. We were so hoping to get pregnant quickly and praying with our friends that they would too. It was such a sweet moment when that pregnancy test read positive. We were and are incredibly thankful. 
• At our first doctor's appointment for the baby we found out we were about seven and a half weeks along. It was so surreal to see that tiny white figure on the ultrasound machine (already taking such a beautiful baby-shape) and know that was our child. 

• Telling our parents, families, and friends about the baby was so fun! Everyone was very excited and all the responses were so different. With each person we told, we were reminded how blessed we are to have such wonderful people in our lives. It's neat to hear everyone dream about the role they'll have in her life. 
• My dad had the perfect idea for how we would share the news about the baby with my siblings. We all gathered in my parents' kitchen thanksgiving evening and held hands as Dad prayed over the meal. He got a little chocked up near the end of his prayer and thanked God for "the newest member of our family". As he spoke those words, I pulled out a little sonogram image from my sweater and passed it to my sister Annie. She looked down at the picture in her hands and SCREAMED.  Everyone else quickly opened their eyes and saw the black and white picture. We all laughed, hugged, and screamed and there were very happy tears. 

The Monthly Checkups

• At the checkups I always say, "I could listen to that heartbeat for hours!" There is so much love and pride in my baby that fills my heart when I hear that strong heartbeat. 
• Our twenty week ultrasound/gender appointment day was hands down one of the very best days of my life. From the moment I woke up, the whole day had such a beautiful glow about it. Luke wrote the most wonderful blog post that night. Click here to head on over to his blog. He captured the day perfectly! I love that guy so much. :)

• The nurse and the doctor at the twenty week ultrasound both commented on how beautiful Bekah's lips are… isn't that sweet? Every part of her that they showed us on the screen was the new most beautiful thing we had ever seen! The tiny but strong bones in her legs, how she rubbed her little face with her hands, and the way she smiled for the doctor's picture (as if she knew her mommy and daddy were seeing her)… everything about her was just so beautiful.
• After that appointment I didn't want to think about anything but her. I was so filled with love for our little girl. I didn't want to think about a registry or a baby shower or anything of that other fun stuff… just Bekah. Her sweet face has the tightest grip on my heart and I am so happy to just think about her. 

Pregnancy Body + Cravings

• I've heard every woman has a really different experience with how she views her body during pregnancy. There have been some tough days but for the most part I've appreciated my body more and I've loved seeing the bump emerge as my body makes more room for my Bekah. Every time we see her on the screen, hear her heartbeat, or feel her kicks, I am blown away by the fact that God is using my body to nurture her! What an amazing miracle. 

• I've been trying out pre-natal pilates lately and really enjoy it. The weather here has been freezing and snowy so I'm eagerly awaiting spring walks outdoors in the warm weather. 
• Some people have asked me what my biggest cravings are: spicy food and anything sour. I can not tell you how much buffalo chicken I have consumed in the past 5 months. Luckily, heartburn hasn't been an issue. :)
• My favorite maternity clothing so far has been from Target and Old Navy. I especially love these leggings, this tank top in green and white, and these maternity jeans. A couple of my other favorites aren't listed online right now. :)

Other Happy Memories

• Luke and I picked the name Bekah (or Rebekah) a couple years ago while we were still just dating and talking about our future family. The name just stuck. :) After a little research we discovered Rebekah means "captivating". We are definitely captivated by her! 
• I started to feel definite kicks around nineteen or twenty weeks. At first they were a little difficult to identify but now Luke is able to feel her kicks too! For a few days she was really active around 1:30am. I love when Luke says, "Bekah is a daddy's girl!" in response to her late night kicks. He is a night owl and dreams about their future hang-outs watching movies or reading on the couch. 

• My beautiful friend Kelly and I have due dates that are only one day apart! They're the ones we were praying with! Nick and Kelly are so precious to Luke and me. We are so blessed to know them and call them our friends. Kelly is like a pregnancy encyclopedia… any time I have a question about if something is safe to eat or about some kind of symptom, she knows the answer. ;) She is going to be an amazing mom!
• We love, love, love dreaming about Bekah and praying for her.
• Last but not least, I never want to forget how loving my husband has been during this season. He is truly a man of God who deeply loves me and Bekah and shows it through his sacrificial love for us. I can't imagine a kinder, more patient, hard-working husband than him. I can't wait until the day when I watch his handsome face as he holds our Bekah for the first time.

Love you all. Thanks for joining in this journey as we await the arrival of our baby!

Bonnie

my pinterest board for Bekah's nursery - a board of other baby-related pins 

my instagram for more updates

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Hope for Hurting Girls

Hey friends!

What a week it's been! After our three day weekend we ended up having two more snow days. Kind of a strange start to the semester but now things are getting back to normal. :) I want to share with you a story from my own life that God used to encourage+empower me this morning in chapel.

9th or 10th grade Bonnie :)

When I was in ninth grade I went through a short season of prayer where I often asked God what my "calling" was. I had rededicated my life to Jesus about ten months before when I was overwhelmed by the truth that my relationship with God needed to be personal. I couldn't just be a good girl and a Christian because my parents raised me that way… I had to decide if I would follow Jesus by myself, no matter what, for the rest of my life. That was a really precious time where I first started experiencing the power of the Holy Spirit and desiring to do something with my newly refreshed faith.

So in October of my ninth grade year, ten months after recommitting my life to Jesus, and right smack dab in the middle of a season where I was asking God what he made me to do… I attended a "legacy service" for our pastor who was retiring. That night was a beautiful tribute from the church that honored his years of faithful service. My pastor shared about the first time God gave him a deep burden for people who don't know Jesus. Sitting here, about seven years later, I can still remember him saying that he wept bitterly as he envisioned endless floods of people falling over some kind of cliff into hell. He was overwhelmed and broken by the need for those people to be helped.

Pastor Paul continued to carry that burden throughout his life. So many lives were reached and saved by Jesus because of his faithfulness to do something about that burden that God gave him.

I went home that night and when it was time for bed, I laid down and in the dark I started to sing and pray. "Give me one pure and holy passion. Give me one magnificent obsession. Give me one glorious ambition for my life, to know and follow hard after You." I remember I didn't sing or pray too long that night before tears filled me and poured out of me. At that moment, laying there in my dark room, the Holy Spirit spoke to me about the call God had placed on my life.

I saw a bright but blurry picture. I could see two women sitting at a table and I knew one of them was me. The other woman seemed younger than me... maybe a teenager or young adult. She had long dark hair and was wearing a red flannel shirt (funny detail, right?). We were just sitting there working on something together. Even with such a simple image, the Holy Spirit's message was bold and clear on my heart.

That night God gave me a burden for helping young women who are hurting, especially those who have suffered abuse, are stuck in self-harm, or have been neglected in some way. I knew from that night on that God made me to counsel these girls and help them find hope and healing through Jesus. Maybe in a counseling center or maybe in a home where they will come and live for a while. My heart really broke for them that night. I didn't want those girls to feel alone or hopeless anymore.

This morning when God brought this memory back to mind in chapel, it filled me up and refreshed me. I felt like God breathed fresh air into my lungs and set my feet on the right track again. I felt bold and confident and ready to help. The funny thing is, I never dreamed about counseling young women before that October night. But in one instant where the Holy Spirit came and met me, I knew God made me for this. 

Friends, there are so many fears and questions that can fill up our heads when God gives us a dream. I've thought in the past of all the reasons why I wouldn't be good at working with teen girls or why someone else would be better suited for the job. But none of that really matters. God can do it and He will. His spirit is living and breathing and moving in us and it will affect the people He puts us around.

It's been seven years since God first spoke to me about my calling to counsel girls. I never want to loose sight of this gift He's given me because I really do believe that I get to be the hands and feet of Jesus in reaching out to some girls who truly need hope and a fresh start. Every single time over the last seven years that I've asked God to renew the passion in me for counseling hurting girls, He's been faithful to do it in a tangible way. Our dreams really do matter to Him! He cares about them even more than we do! :)

Get the Conversation Going

I started praying today that God would use this post for His purposes. I'd love to get a conversation going where we share about the dreams God has given us and we pray for over each other's dreams, too. Maybe you haven't had an experience quite like this but there's something that has always had a hold of your heart… some circumstance or group of people. Please share them below! And let the rest of us know how we can pray for you.

My prayer for you is that God would breathe fresh air into your life and dreams today as He reminds you that you were made purposefully and will make an eternal impact for Him on this earth. Love you, readers. Can't wait to read what you share!

Love,
Bonnie

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