I was just reading this sweet post by Becky at Farmgirl Paints. She wrote about her daughter who recently turned fourteen and about what it's like to look back at that age from an older, mama-view. It really touched my heart just thinking about what it will be like to sit in Bekah's room with her someday as she shares her happiness and sadness and everything in between with Luke and I. That girl is going to be amazing, I know it already. :) Even at only twenty-six weeks pregnant, I feel very blessed to be her mama.
That post got me thinking about some of the stuff that feels tender and special in my heart lately. So I thought I'd share it here with you as a little sounding board. God is so good and in control of all the things that feel so unknown to me right now. I hope somehow this post encourages you that He knows your heart and cares about the things you care about, that He'll always be there for you to help you work it out and make it through life like the conqueror you are.
First: I've been thinking a lot about counseling lately. I shared a post a couple months back about my heart for girls who are hurting and in need of hope. Did you know I'm a pastoral counseling major at school? I really do enjoy the major and respect my professors a lot. This semester's counseling/psychology courses have made me a much more understanding person, I think. Understanding in the sense that my heart feels a little softer for people in whatever situations they're in. I am less quick to assume I know why someone is going through what they're going through and just more willing to wait and listen. I have to be honest, this area of my life has felt a little confusing lately. Sometimes learning about counseling frustrates me. It messes with my pride because I want to be right. I want to know why things are the way they are and what people mean by the things they say. Does that make sense? I've had days where I've questioned if I'm in the right major and I've felt a little bitter towards the idea of being a counselor. Such a funny position to be in, knowing there is something God will do with this calling but not always feeling that it fits me. But I know I don't need to be tossed around and all over the place by my worries or questions. This is a journey of faith and I can make it through these days that feel sorta confusing and trust God's love for me. Ephesians 3:20, right? He is able to do immeasurably more than all we could ask for or imagine… I believe that about your future, too. Is there anything about your future I could be praying about?
Second: Marriage. Friday through Sunday, Luke and I were blessed by our sweet friends Nick and Kelly with the opportunity to go to Family Life's Weekend to Remember. It was such a beautiful weekend. We stayed at this Downton-like lodge in the Poconos (man, is anyone else already ready for season five?) and we just focused on "us" for a few days. It felt like another honeymoon and it was wonderful. Luke is my best friend and truly a joy to be with. I felt like the luckiest girl at the entire conference to have him by my side. He is an amazing man who loves me in such a selfless way and amazes me with his kindness and strength. As soon as we came home I was reminded how easy it is to not focus on your marriage. School and work and daily tasks make life busy, but it will always be worth it to shut the computer, turn off my phone, slow down a little… and just enjoy being with my husband. Marriage is a wonderful thing.
Third: Bekah. I shared a little about this beautiful girl in the beginning of the post, but my goodness, what a joy she is already. We love her deeply and can't wait to snuggle her in less than fourteen weeks.
Of course there's more, but it was helpful to share just those three tonight. What's been on your heart lately? Sometimes it helps to write it all out and remember there's hope and grace available for whatever's going on in our lives.
Love you, friends! Thanks for reading what's on my heart.